Forced To Touch / Reluctant to Touch

  If you didn't already know this, I am obsessed with how people in NYC interact with each other on the trains. It is something that I have blogged about before and it still fascinates me to no end. There is so much information going on underground between human beings. When you are on the train there are certain times when you with touch another person. This is a given and you cannot avoid it in actuality. If the train is full, then you will have some one's shoulder, leg, or even hair all over you. Now what do you do in this situation? The average Manhattanite, is so used to it that they don't even feel it anymore. However, there are some people who have lived here for their whole lives and they cannot stand it even for a second.

  So I watched a few people today on the train.This one girl came on with her friend, however, she could not find a comfortable place to hold on before the train left the station. So what did she do? She just balanced herself until the next stop. At the next stop many people got off, so she found space on the pole. I forgot to add that there was a man standing next to her. She said excuse me to him., however, he did not hear her as she tried to slide only two fingers high above her head to at least try to balance on the curved rod. She was comfortable after about 4 stops.

   Next a male couple got on. They were dressed in very light summer clothing and seemed happy as can be. They did something interesting. The guy who was standing almost exactly in the same spot as the girl I just described just placed his hand on his partner's shoulder. It was a fast decision and everyone was happier because of it. That's what it's all about. Hold the other person up when they need help. This has nothing to do with race, sex, or nationality.

   Now what about the times when you have the choice to be closer or not? This happens all of the time in an empty train. People come in and sit at least 2 chairs from the closet person. Tonight as I came home, all of the seats were taken. I could have offered my chair to anyone, however, I did not this time.

    I just watched and made note of all the interesting moments and eye directions. Anyhow, we are living in a time that seems to offer more ways for us not to touch than there are to actually touch. When people are sitting on a seat and then moving over to be by themselves, it's a personal thing.
I remember taking that personal at one point years ago. Now I just let it go and move on. If given the choice to touch or not touch, I believe most people would say no. Why do I say that? Well, because to be touched, you have to be comfortable with you first. Recently, I hugged a good friend that was going through a really tough time. I made it a longer than usual hug. I felt that she needed it. It calmed her so much and she thanked me for the transfer of good energy. I found this quote about hugging:

"We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth."       - Paul Zak             

    I really love that quote. If everyone believed that sentence, it would be such a different world now wouldn't it? I think that I hug more now than I ever did before. I cannot explain it, I just do. Lastly, if having more contact with people in general would allow you to live a longer life, would you? Let that question roll around in your head like the silver ball in a pinball machine. Be well people.



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