From The Other Side

  There are moments that truly yank on my soul that I cannot ignore. It's just so amazing that we are experiencing life on so many different levels, yet so similar at the very same time. I was in a deep conversation with a very deep and passionate woman a few days ago that humbled me.

   We spoke of her relationship with her current girlfriend. They have been in this relationship for a few years I believe. She is from South America and her father did not accept her same sex relationship. I felt that he was embarrassed or felt that his daughter should not be gay under any circumstances. Obviously, she was broken down by this. She loves her father and she wishes that he would give her his blessing.

    The focus of this posting though, is that I was listening to her and realizing that I was now listening to a young woman that was experiencing something that I had gone through. No, not the father and the gay relationship. She is dealing with a partner that claims to not want to have anything to with her, yet she keeps calling her over and over to tell her that she is a terrible person. Imagine someone calling you that tells you how you are worth nothing and that you should not contact them anymore. Yet, they are calling and texting you to say that? Strange, no?

     I have learned from my share of heart break that when someone loves you, they never resort to this kind of behavior. True love will always find a way top stay civil and calm no matter what happens. Imagine a person that you shared countless hours with over years suddenly spewing the most angry and rude statements at you and telling you that they will never speak to you again in this life. That cannot be love now can it? Well, let me out it like this, if it is love, then they are fighting a battle within themselves that they cannot see past. When they do, the love will become clear again.

    We all hit a wall or two as it relates to love and relationships, however, we can always choose how we act towards those that we love. The magic of this is that we can look back and see how certain situations changed the way that we handle ourselves right now. That person who really slammed us back then has most times made us the calm or more aware person that we are today. Yes, I am aware that it also works in reverse, but I know if you really thought about it carefully, you would choose to be the happy and resilient person that can smile easily and move forward.

     I saw myself in this woman as she spoke. I saw myself in her position, but many years back and I could see my growth. It was a great moment and I gave her what little advice that I could. I told her that letting people hurt you is a choice. Staying around them after they hurt you is a choice as well. She actually agreed, but then told me that she loved her so much and that she will try to make this relationship work anyway. I respected that and I knew that she was authentic and real with her decision. There is no specific formula for the burns and scraps that love inflicts on us. It happens and then we decide how we want to proceed. The best thing is that there is always so much more to experience in love no matter how much you think you already know. That is how I see it from my perspective. Love to you all. You deserve it for sure.



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