The Soft Side Of Friendship

     I had a rundown of what friendship means to me in my head. I truly do not know where it came from, it just arrived at the top of my dome and demanded that I think about it today. I also got a call from a person that I have been friends with since 1989. She and I have been speaking for that long without a hitch ever. There is only one other person that I meat during that same time that I am also very close with as well. I pushed it around in my mind and asked myself, how is it that these people have remained solid friends with me after all of these years with nothing but the best of energy and not a hint of difficulty or push back? What is that thing that makes people just flow with you and not have an inch of pushing back? I pondered this at length today.

     Just to be clear, I believe that we need those who challenge us just as much as we need situations that challenge us. There is a limit though. If we seriously listened to what our closets friends were saying most times, we would hear so much more. I have been listening a bit more lately and I have found some really eye opening insights. Number one is that when I listen for an extended period of time, I don't even want to talk afterwards. It happened to me about 3 days ago. I was listening to a good friend of mine and she just talked for 80% of the call. I really heard her. I know that she appreciated it too. She was speaking about men and I just listened. It was very therapeutic. I learned a few things too. That is for another posting for sure.

     Did you ever have a friend that just drowns you with a trough of good energy and appreciation and just flows? You know that one that just makes you feel as though you are wrapped up in a warm blanket? I am just describing one of many types of friends right now. I have many types of friends and they are all so valuable to me on many levels. The truth is that we are all built differently and we all offer our friendship to others in a different way. My one gem of advice is, do not run after any one's friendship. It is not worth it and it does not make you a stronger person on any level. We are all here to raise each other up in one way or another. I feel that so completely. So if you are not feeling that connection, exit stage left. Time is our most valuable asset in my humble opinion.

     The soft side of friendship for me is triggered when someone says any one of these things:

"I am here for you."
"You are doing a great job."
"You can make it happen."
"I've really missed you. Let's get together."
"I will make time for you."
"Please do not apologize for telling me what you are going through."
"Just tell me how I can help?"
" It's so nice to hear your voice."
"That thing you said the other day, really helped me."
"You are such a good friend."
"Well, let me know if you need me."
"I'll help you move."
"You want me to pick it up for you?"
"If you need it, then just take mine."

      These are all random and not expected at all from anyone. However, they feel so good when they are said. My real friends are so diverse, yet they make themselves known by their actions and words. I am so appreciative to have some really solid friends. They make me want to be there for them in any way that I can. They make me do it with pleasure. I am so grateful that I can write this post about them. Thank you



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