The No Show Experience

   There are times in our lives when we are faced with people who decide not to show up. We all have times in our lives that do not work out the way that we think that they will. It is unfortunate that we have to encounter these situations, but we do. You may have a time to show up for work, or a dinner date. If you have somewhere to be, you generally will make it there after a while. So what happens when you do "not" show up to your appointment or date? Does it change your energy with that person or that organization? Can they move forward and give you another chance to make good? Some times yes, and some times no.

    So here is the situation. I had a rehearsal this evening. The rehearsal was planned for 4 people. 2 of the 4 showed up and 2 didn't. One of the two guys that didn't show up was coming to fill in for our usual guy on his instrument. That's right, the fill in didn't show up. We called him and he said that he had forgotten. Needless to say, he will not be invited back to the band in the future. My good friend and I wondered, what was he thinking? Did he just not want to do this gig? Did he care that he just left us hanging? Either way, its game over for him.

   Here is the concept that comes forward for me with this whole situation. In life sometimes people need a reason to show. They need a reason to step outside of their comfort zone. This was not a paid rehearsal and the actual gig will pay each person about $500 towards a flight to anywhere that the company flies. This is not a shabby gift by any standards. But yet and still, each person views life from their own perspective. Most people are tuned into their own station. What is the station you ask? It's called WIIFM. What's in it for me? When this takes place, all bets are off for those around them. To be fair, we never know what is happening in people's lives to make them not show up. On the other hand, when they are involved in a group movement, it hurts the team and creates a bit of tension.

    So what is the up side here? I believe that it's the fact that we can choose to make conscious decisions so that we do not inconvenience others. If you can't make it, call. If you don't want to do something, say no. If someone is pushing you to do something that is unnatural or painstaking to your soul, pass on it. If you feel that you are not capable of completing a task, make sure that someone can in your absence. None of us are perfect, yet, we are all aware that we cannot exist alone and that what we do matters to others. If you feel differently about this, then your life is most likely quite different as well. If you own it and navigate it that way, more power to you.

    The moral of this story is, if you can't show, then let someone know. It leaves a mark. Each of us has to connect with another human being to make the most magical things happen. When you are missing, it's not possible. Showing up consistently is a magic trait. Make it happen.




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