The Love Languages Brush Up

  I am not sure how many of you reading this blog have ever read the book The 5 Love Languages, but trust me, it's a big must. I make it a habit not to write about my personal life here for my own reasons. However, trust and believe, I work at the methods of love and the preservation of love tirelessly. I don't profess to be an expert on it at all. I am still learning and going through my own boot camp as it relates to this topic. There is always more to learn, see, be, and to do. The adventure is quite thrilling actually.

   So I read the first four chapters of this book today for the first time. I had skipped around it prior to today and received some huge gems that changed my perspective a bit here and there. By the way, reading the first 4 chapters only got me into the explanation of one love language. So just to let you know what I mean, there are 5 major love languages, according to the author, Gary Chapman. They are Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts Of Service, and Physical Touch. The chapter that begins these five was Words Of Affirmation.I thoroughly enjoyed the chapter because it sent a simple message to couples. Speak as much as you can of what your partner does well. Can it get any easier than that? I am joking of course. It is a nice and direct formula for creating more smiles though, I am sure that you would agree.

    This chapter was full of great information that really made so much sense. It spoke of kind words, encouraging words, and how the tongue has the power of life and death. I love the fact that it brings up that the tone of how things are said is crucial. I know for a fact that how things are offered, are often not how they are received in many cases. So we can fall into dark hole at times and that causes a bit of tension. In other words, this who speak with fire on their tongue cannot expect to water the plants. I have no idea where that came from, believe me. I kind of like it though. The other thing was giving guidance not demands or ultimatums. I had an experience with this about 3 years ago and it was so hard for me. I got passed it though and it made me stronger.

    Before I end this posting, I want to write something that I read that gave me some pause. I would like to see how it hits you. Here is it is:

  "One who is in love is not genuinely interested in fostering the personal growth of the other person. If we have any purpose in mind when we fall in love it is to terminate our own loneliness and perhaps  ensure this result through marriage.The in-love experience does not focus on our own growth or on the growth and development the other person. Rather, it gives us the sense that we have arrived and that we do not need further growth. We are at the apex of life's happiness, and our only desire is to stay there. Certainly our beloved does not need to grow because he/she is perfect. We simply hope that they will remain that way."

    I felt so many things after reading this. Sit with that for a moment. You know how I love to keep your mind moving. Keep it real, stay strong.



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