Right or Wrong? Soft or Strong?

   I have taken almost a month off of Facebook and I can honestly say that I feel so much different. I feel clearer in a sense. I am well aware of most things going on around me in my community and in the world at large. Most importantly, I am in a state of non judgement as I relates to my many friends who still frequent it day for hours at a time. My concern is this, connect with the people who you care for head to head or even in a phone call and be present. It's simple and it changes the energy each and every time. It really works.
    So a few days ago I was in the dressing room at my yoga  studio and I saw a book that I had read quite some time ago called "Ask And It Is Given". I was so happy to see the title again that I asked the guy who was sitting next to the book if it was his. He confirmed that it was and a conversation  ensued that went in a different direction, based on an outside energy. As we spoke, I told my new found acquaintance that this book was so powerful and that I wished each person would take the time to read it. He replied by saying that some may be swayed by the talk of religion or spirits and so forth. I agreed and also told him that people are consistent with making up a reason for not reading things that may take them out of their comfort zone.
    It's always so fascinating to me how an outside person can insert him or herself into a conversation without warning and place their opinion front and center. Out of nowhere another man started talking and he had a point of view that he was not shy about delivering. I need to mention at this point that this man was naked. Now I don't know about you, but when a grown man of about 60 or so is rendering his viewpoint naked, the vibe is a bit different.I don't want to get to descriptive here, just use your own crayons for a moment. So, his stance was that all of the same information excel better, is all in the bible. I gave him respect for that point and told him that it was undoubtedly true, however, that it is just not the path for each and every person on the earth. He pressed on, still naked, by telling me that most of these writers were Charlatans, I believe was the term he used. I took an internal deep breath and an external soft sigh. Did I need to be right in this exchange? Do I need to muscle up to him? Can't I just let him have his opinion? My answers were, no, no, and yes. He continued driving his point home with fierce vigor and I let him run free like a young buck across the terrain. It was so satisfying. He left with his chest  pushed forward and I shook his hand and told him that it was nice to have met him. By the way, the original gentleman that I was speaking with remained quiet and was quite amused by our entire exchange.
     Last evening I performed at a very upscale venue in NYC. I was on the 46th floor and the view was beyond incredible..I was with 4 other musicians and the guests totaled about 45. When I go to these venues, as I do quite frequently, I continually say to myself that I am grateful and I am so very fortunate.. Those words have different meanings and I use them both whenever I can. As life goes, sometimes in the calmest most zen moments, a challenge is right around the bend. The bandleader and I went to speak with the host, who was a very cordial man. He thanked us again for being there and asked us if we had eaten any food as of yet. We had not, so he invited us to partake in the very appetizing looking food across the room. As we made our way to the food, there were other guests ahead of us. We got behind them and waited. After getting our food, I turned to the stage area and a small skirmish was underway. Without going to deep into it, the entire thing was ego based and it was about to go to another level. Body language never lies.
      In short, musicians very rarely eat with guests unless permission has been given prior by the venue supervisor or Maître d. That is a known fact, however, the host had already given us the green light. The problem came when my leader bumped heads with the manager. They engaged in some strong verbal Olympics that could have really escalated in a negative fashion, thankfully they did not. I watched it and I gleaned some clear cut repeat lessons. Firstly, it's almost always better to start a conversation from a friendly perspective even when you are wrapped up in ego entitlement mode. Both parties had made up their minds that they were not budging and that try would keep their guns drawn. Another woman had to intersect and calm the situation.,watching it from the sidelines was very interesting to say the very least. Second lesson, respect is most often times not given until it is received. That is a big one for me. I say that because I have had to swallow my pride upfront a fees times in business situations, just to break the small barrier in front of me and have a calm exchange. I always remind myself that I am entering a movie that is already in progress when I meet a new person. We don't get the previews to become familiar with cast members ahead of time. This can create a few pitfalls and they are tough to bounce back from in the moment.
    What a great evening it was, even though  I felt as though I was only operating with half of my voice. I struggled to get sounds out based on fatigue from three days of continuous singing. Yet and still, people approached myself and the band to tell us how much they loved us. Life is so good, and unpredictable, and full of curve balls, let downs, sparks of light, and most of all, choices. I am happy you are reading my blog. I appreciate it and I do not take it for granted...
     Be well. I appreciate you.



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